bad 2 worse
Things have gone from bad to worse this last week. things have changed so much, Dad pasted away way before he was due to leave us.
After being told he had "months" to live he survived just 12 days. things just plummeted out of control. for a few weeks Dad had been treated with fairly strong painkillers, after several cruel side effects the doctors decided to remove them. without any clue to how his health really was due to a almost coma ed state he was left in. They choose to cut him right back to parctamol, the day they did that seemed to prove he wasn't nearly as bad as it had seemed - on the outside at least. he seemed so much better, able to talk and smile. The next morning things made a complete turn around and the doctor then decided to put dad on morphine. we spent most of the day with him as the dose of morphine was increased time and time and time again. we was forced to go home though commitments, leaving dad with the rest of the family whom had not been there though the day.
That night I hadn't slept well as normally (due to pregnancy) I was laid dosing slightly but still very aware. I opened my eyes and saw the bedroom door closing. I thought this must be my husband going to the bathroom. I didn't give this a second thought until I turned over and faced - My husband! now with only 2 people including my self in the house there I was was in total shock, how the hell, who the hell! it could only be him and there he was laid fast a sleep. I reached out and touched him to make sure he was really there. I looked at him then the door this repeated over and over, realising more and more that the impossible had just happened.
It scared me there was no sound at all. nothing.
I whispered at first Kevin, over and over. scared in case that what ever had done it would hear me. as i called him over and over I became more scared. he woke and I explained what I had seen. and that I was 100% sure of my eyes had seen. I saw no person just the door.
he told me not to be so silly, it could be anything. but I knew that the door Never does that. I know the house and there are no draughts or any logical reason for that door to have been opened and to have closed in front of my eyes. I explained it was just as if someone had closed the door behind them. As if someone was leaving.
an hour or so give or take pasted. Kevin held my hand to calm me. I was scared and stared terrifyingly at the door for the hole time. I then heard the phone ringing down stairs, at 4.30 just gone. most people know that is not a good sign.
The call was that Dad was dieing. we rushed and grabbed out clothes to run out to the country side where they live. in less then 2 minutes we received another call saying he had died.
The turn was so fast it was so shocking and we are all still in total shock.